Author James Clear wrote, “Focus is the art of knowing what to ignore.” So true, but easy to forget, with numerous distractions available at your fingertips. Whether your vice relates to validating hunches, senseless scrolling, or playing games, the ability to get lost in something mindless is easy.
Unfortunately, these types of activities can become habits that deplete your energy making you lose momentum on what you want to accomplish. Turning inward to address these systemic issues is essential for overcoming resistance and realigning with your goals.
Furthermore, accepting inherent truths about change and viewing hurdles as opportunities for learning can inspire you to work through obstacles and stay committed to moving in a new direction.
Get picky about what you consume through your five senses.
The energy or vibe you create, take in, or pick up is fueling your thoughts, emotions, and actions. To help ensure that your mindset and outlook support your efforts, cultivate habits that strengthen your resolve, where you are purposeful in your intentions and are living in congruence.
The more grounded and attuned to your body and instincts, the less likely you’ll be triggered by others or your environment. It’s when you feel a sense of peace and ease that you can enter what Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi coined as the “flow,” where you can access your creativity with minimal interference.
Stay on track with activities that propel you forward.
Regardless of your threshold for navigating change, transitions from point A to point B are messy in the middle. The push and pull, as well as the uncertainty, can span from exciting to exhausting to frustrating, potentially clouding your judgment.
Also, try not to hold on too tightly to who, what, when, where, and how everything must happen, as these constraints can make the process harder. Instead, adopt strategies that reframe your focus of attention and help you self-regulate and quickly bounce back if you return to old patterns or get thrown off kilter.
Here are seven strategies that can support your transformation efforts.
#1 Seek clarity.
When you want things to be different but you’re unsure what will improve your circumstances, you may feel upset, angry, or apathetic. To help you mobilize into action, you must have a vision of where you want to head. To help you evaluate, think through questions like, “What’s important to me?” “How do I want to feel?” and “What would make me feel better than I do now?” The answers to these questions can help you frame your desire into a vision, goal, or purpose statement.
#2 Welcome the contradictions.
There is an inherent beauty in paradoxes. Just think of a part of you or someone who has exasperated you with their inconsistent, sometimes erratic comments or behaviors. On the positive side, these polarities help you determine your values and discern what you like and dislike, what you want and do not want. When it comes to personalities, preferences, and emotions, the only logical thing is welcoming and accepting the irrational irony rather than getting thrown off by it.
#3 Identify and work on closing the gaps.
Once you are clear about where you want to head, progress is all about closing the gaps between your current and future states. Think through what may be stopping you from attaining your goals. Understanding the why behind your behavior, i.e., how you think, feel, and act, can help you work through challenges. Additionally, organizing your thoughts, creating a strategic plan, and conducting a personal SWOT analysis can help you circumvent issues and take action on things that advance your efforts.
#4 Invite possibility.
Make space for visualizing by looking at the past, present, and future. Access your higher expression by embodying how you want to be and feel. Additionally, befriending your inner critic can help you minimize automatic reactions and maintain objectivity in your interactions. You can also seek counsel from trusted sources to expand your outlook. Ask questions, like “What do you think?” or “What could be another way?” When you openly listen to what is shared you give yourself the chance to invite in new opportunities.
#5 Invest in self-care.
Balance isn’t a permanent state; it requires continual awareness and tweaking, which is why self-care is a necessity that takes practice and discipline. Being deliberate in your intentions—before you start an activity and when you’re about to pivot to a new one—can help you maximize your energy and focus. Equally important is knowing how you feel and what your body needs, as well as managing through your emotional waves. Often, there can be a disparity between what you physically need and what you think you need.
#6 Recognize the potential impacts on your relationships.
When you’re in a partnership, you can unconsciously or consciously activate the best or the worst in both of you. You can lose appreciation for another person if you concentrate too much on what bothers you rather than what you have in common. Keep in mind that how you navigate your transformation can cause tension with others, where you expect them to change without their consent. When you find yourself too focused on another person’s way of being, take a breather, repair any communication mishaps, and redirect your energy toward your priorities.
#7 Acknowledge and celebrate progress.
“Great things are done by a series of small things brought together” is a quote attributed to Vincent van Gogh that embodies how continuous improvements and simple, structured steps forward—whether big or small—can result in profound change. Staying calm and focused while aiming for progress, rather than perfection, requires dedication and practice. Remember, it’s a journey, not a destination. Embrace the process and celebrate progress along the way.
Prioritize YOU.
In a world full of many demands, there is no one way to approach life. It’s easy to get sidetracked and delay your own needs in support of others. A critical step in taking care of yourself is blocking the time to do so. This means setting up the necessary boundaries to give yourself as much time as you would to someone else. Go to your calendar right now and begin blocking out time for yourself to invest in what matters most to you.
Activate your best with those around you.
Self-leadership is about getting to know yourself better and applying that knowledge to how you interact with others. As a lifelong student, certified professional coach, and consultant, activating the best in others through self-leadership, interpersonal relations, and team dynamics are passions of mine. My approach is personalized and customized, tapping into various assessments, disciplines, modalities, and techniques. Also, check out my “Micro & Mini Service Offerings” and try one session to inspire you. Sign up solo or with another person or group to work on a specific exercise or activity and split the costs! Contact me to get started.