As a leader, setting direction, cultivating camaraderie, and inspiring others toward a shared purpose are essential aspects of your role. Furthermore, managing expectations, prioritizing, and guiding are necessary to stay focused and sustain momentum.
Additionally, how you communicate makes a substantial difference in how you connect with colleagues and foster trust. People will perceive and judge your intentions based on their worldview and motivation.
For example, some may be skeptical about your motives if you have an inconsistent approach to what you say or do. Whereas, if you’re clear, direct, and reliable, they may be more willing to believe you’ll deliver on your promises.
Watch out for the tendencies to gloss over the unpleasant or create unintentional confusion.
By leading discussions into deeper, more meaningful dialogue, you demonstrate that you’re interested in the other person and not just concerned with what’s important to you or a specific outcome.
The Greek philosopher Epictetus reminds us, “We become what we give our attention to.” Keeping centered on what matters most is key. When you become too attached to your thoughts and feelings, stop and assess, “But, What if?” to shift your outlook and welcome additional perspectives.
Acknowledging that multiple options exist to attain the same or similar result is crucial for finding common ground to compromise and not get stuck in one-way thinking.
Balance short-term requests and long-term visioning.
Don’t let circumstances dictate your behavior. Your values and ethics should not be contingent upon people or situations, such as last-minute requests. What you say—and don’t say—and how you react or don’t react—makes an impression on those you’re interacting with and impacts how they feel and respond.
Consistency in showing up and staying firm when needed can help you create stability, especially in difficult times like change or uncertainty. If you need to shift direction, being objective, honest, apologetic, and listening with positive intention can help people adjust more easily.
Here are five ways to safeguard your state of mind and help team members balance assignments and remain focused:
#1 Self-regulate.
Regardless of your position, you are human, which means you will experience various emotions based on what’s going on at work and in your life. Instead of passing along any nervous energy or negativity, try to self-regulate to help process these feelings through you. This way, you can accept what-is, create balance within, and bounce back with more clarity. Often, there is a disparity between what is asked of you and what is needed, so instead of jumping into solution mode, take a moment to stabilize your system. You can do this by placing your feet firmly on the ground and taking deep breaths. Putting your hand over your heart and extending yourself compassion can allow whatever needs to surface to come to light without judgment. With this awareness, you can recalibrate, organize your thoughts, and determine your next steps.
#2 Discern.
There are many reasons why your judgment may become clouded, including inherent emotional highs and lows. Further, when you’re overwhelmed, going “a mile a minute,” or stuck in some perpetual loop of people-pleasing, it’s easy to forget what makes the most sense. Discernment helps you stay in sync with your natural rhythm, provides insight into how you truly feel, and helps you realize what is and is not in your control. By understanding and accepting your limits and restrictions, you can concentrate on what is in your control to move forward.
#3 Keep it real.
Strong partnerships are founded on mutual trust and respect, where commitments are negotiated and aligned. Expand your perspective before taking immediate action. Unlocking potential is not about bombarding someone, including yourself, with to-dos. If the demand is too much, start a dialogue to establish what is possible given the request. Courage is the ability to get real, face difficulty head-on, and persevere. It’s not hiding the truth or covering up concerns to make everything seem okay. You display confidence by managing expectations, respecting capabilities, and knowing when and when not to push anyone, including yourself, beyond their limitations.
#4 Assert with care.
Feeling certain about something is dynamic and can vary depending on your beliefs, circumstances, and the influence someone else has over you. Self-awareness enables you to be more detached in your approach, limiting the need for external validation. Express your facts objectively and lean into your expertise to assert your viewpoint. Probing with questions like, “How would you suggest we accomplish the task at hand?” “What would you recommend we do?” and “When would you be able to deliver X?” can also help stir discussion. When you enter into conversations in a calm, confident, and curious manner, you claim your position and emit a vibe that infuses hope and possibility for a collaborative path forward.
#5 Acknowledge progress.
Most people want to be seen, heard, and appreciated. Respecting those you work with and confirming that their efforts are noticeable goes a long way in creating strong relationships. Reflecting on the progress, success, and lessons learned gives you a reason to celebrate your accomplishments and recognize others for their contributions. During key milestones—big and small—you can converse about what’s working well or needs to be modified as you advance. To display gratitude, here are some simple steps to say thanks.
Sometimes, all it takes is YOU.
You don’t need a specific job title to lift someone up. It’s a choice you can make at any moment. Taking a more active role in the well-being of others not only positively impacts them but activates the best in you as well. Establishing a safe space for courageous communication where others feel empowered to speak up and thrive in their core capabilities is what great leaders and coaches do.
Activate your best with those around you.
Self-leadership is about getting to know yourself better and applying that knowledge to how you interact with others. As a lifelong student, certified professional coach, and consultant, activating the best in others through self-leadership, interpersonal relations, and team dynamics are passions of mine. My approach is personalized and customized, tapping into various assessments, disciplines, modalities, and techniques. Also, check out my “Micro & Mini Service Offerings” and try one session to inspire you. Sign up solo or with another person or group to work on a specific exercise or activity and split the costs! Contact me to get started.