My communication posts are often geared toward improving INTER-personal communication, where one is conversing with or presenting to another person or group to get their message across in a compelling way or to cultivate a connection.

However, how you communicate with yourself—voice, tone, demeanor—also plays a critical role. What you say to and how you treat yourself impacts your self-worth and confidence level regarding who you are and what you’re capable of, affecting how you show up and relate to others.

Enhance your INTRA-personal communication approach.

An internal monologue is a fundamental aspect of yourself that supports everyday living, from managing your activities to working through issues and making decisions. Your inner voices are potent facets of your psyche that integrate your conscious and unconscious thoughts, beliefs, and perceptions. These voices are comprised of various personas with distinct traits, capabilities, wants and desires to keep you healthy and safe.

Depending on how well-aligned you are, your “self-talk” may include opposing opinions, emotions, or sensations that impact how you view yourself and influence your ability to make effective decisions.

Like strengthening relationships and fostering collaboration, listening with positive intention goes a long way in developing trust and connection with yourself. When you’re feeling out of touch or like an “impostor,” turning inward can provide insight into the root causes so you can recognize when you’re being triggered and work through the issues with clarity and compassion to improve your well-being.

Acknowledging what is happening within you.

Throughout your life, there will always be one constant—YOU. That is why believing in yourself is paramount. When you ignore or externalize an issue, you give authority to something outside of you. Going inside allows you to “be real” with yourself and take back control by increasing your self-awareness, acceptance, and appreciation for who you are holistically.

To help get you started, consider answering these questions:

  • How aware am I of my inner dialogue?
  • Do the voices I hear remind me of someone else, e.g., a parent, boss, or sibling?
  • When evaluating options, do I consider both objective and subjective perspectives?
  • Am I at peace or conflicted when making important decisions?
  • What do I think about my abilities, characteristics, traits, and shortcomings?
  • How and when do I judge myself most, and why?
  • How do I acknowledge my achievements?
  • How do I react when I make a mistake or fail at something significant?
  • What do I say to motivate myself?
  • How do I treat myself when things are going well and not so well?
  • On a self-compassion scale, how would I rate myself?

The more you check in with yourself, the easier it will be to observe when you’re provoked so you can stop what you’re doing before reacting. As you pause, you can process your thoughts and feelings, choosing a more thoughtful way to respond. With continuous introspection and intent, you can work through ingrained limiting beliefs, replacing them with new strategies that support your overall system for who you are and want to be.

Redirect your energy to activate your best.

Similar to external relationships, you must show up consistently to solidify trust and deepen bonds. Getting to know yourself and all your parts takes time, commitment, and kindness, so create a habit of going inward to listen. One of my favorite ways to do this is using the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model, which is based on the principle that the human system is comprised of multiple parts. It’s an empowering way to expand your intuitive capacity and work through issues and inner conflicts to feel more aligned and balanced. To learn more, schedule a call with me. As an IFS Coach, creating a safe space to support you would be a privilege.

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